2010 GRAMMYS PERFORMANCE RE-CAP – Are We All Still Fans?

I feel like a fool. Every year I anticipate music’s biggest night to be bigger and better than the years before and every year (for the past few years) I, the consummate music fan, am disappointed. To their credit, this year’s performances started off pretty strong, but then dulled the daylights out of me by the time we’d hit the Taylor Swift mark. Let’s re-cap…

Lady Gaga was undoubtedly the best pick to open the show with her energetic and theatrical stage show. Her performance (clearly “for the gays”) included living musical legend Elton John as they closed the performance with a rendition of Speechless from her Fame Monster album.

Green Day brought delight to fans by performing 21 Guns, alongside the cast of their new Broadway musical American Idiot with a rock-opera type performance that was churchy in parts but musically delicious to the ear.

Then there was Beyonce’s crotch-grabbing performance of If I Were A Boy. She entered Rhythm Nation-style (yes, again!) flanked by dozens of soldiers in a black, armadillo-type get-up. Midway through the performance, she transitioned into a slightly-rocked out version of Alanis Morrisette’s angry anthem You Oughta Know. Now Beyonce, YOU oughta know that the Grammys are about surprises. This performance was rather anti-climactic because we’d seen it before. She should’ve brought out Alanis and made the entire second half of the performance a duet. I’d have cheered through the roof for that.

Pink – rock on!! She stole the show last night with her creative aerial interpretation of Glitter In The Air, from her Funhouse album – best performance of the night! The X-Men made an appearance as well – oh wait, those were the Black Eyed Peas. Waaaayyyy too much going on during that performance and as they transitioned into Boom Boom Pow they fumbled the beat and never fully recovered it. Jamie Foxx should blame his ego (instead of the alcohol) for last night’s fiasco; he took Blame It to a whole other level with a performance that was nothing short of all-over-the-place. The inclusion of Slash had no artistic relevance in the performance and seemed to be more of a display of Jamie’s Hollywood ego than anything. Taylor Swift left her vocals in her seat as she performed Fairytale and You Belong With Me with Stevie Nicks – another forgettable performance.

I was supremely underwhelmed by the Michael Jackson tribute. The Grammys is all about quality in music – which MJ epitomized – and this tribute did not do enough to show what he stood for. Usher apparently left his vocals sitting next to Taylor Swift’s as he was nearly unbearable to hear during Earth Song’s vamp. I did enjoy the familiar classic Livin’ On A Prayer performed by Bon Jovi, but was returned to dullsville with Maxwell’s too-hoarse-for-falsetto attempt at Pretty Wings. I was even more horrified by Roberta Flack’s stiff and effortless entrance and performance of Where Is The Love – it was like someone Botox’ed her entire body. What I could actually hear of the final performance by Drake, Eminem and Lil Wayne, I didn’t really care for but I will say this: Em could’ve performed that song without either of the other 2 and had more of an effect. While they were jumping around the stage like extras on Romper Room, Shady killed the song without even breaking a sweat. And next year Grammys, don’t invite Lil Wayne to perform if you’re gonna mute 99.8% of the song – just let him curse and fine his skinny jeans wearing ass later.

So yeah, C+ this year for the Grammys, but let’s face it: they’re slogan is true – We’re all fans. And because of that, our disdain of this year’s show will fade into nothingness, and next year we’ll be just as amped to watch it again. And there’s a good chance we’ll be just as disappointed once again. But we’ll still be fans.